As If We Are Worthy (B’shalach 5785)

On one side of the sea freedom was all that mattered
On the other side
we discovered that freedom is 
	HARD
takes 	COURAGE
requires us to be	 RESPONSIBLE
But we weren’t ready 
We sang praises of gratitude and then immediately 
began to complain

When we don’t have freedom, we are willing to fight 
for it. Maybe too willing, 
     sometimes
And when we have it
how do we use it?
Do we use it?
Do we value it?
Do we use our own to ensure others
can access their freedoms too?
     Or . . .  

God takes us across the sea
Entrusts us with freedom and Torah
and free-will once more, no matter how badly 
we have and will abuse it
     And
Once we get across
God takes us the long way around
Knowing we’re not ready to face the hardships that come
on the direct route
Knowing we don’t have enough faith for that
     yet
     or maybe ever
But at least with the longer path there’s time to hope
W e might figure it out along the way

The longer way around can be frustrating
but sometimes there are reasons for it
We might not be able to see
when our feet are 
     dragging 
and our hearts are 
     heavy
No matter how anxious we are to get
where we’re going
No matter how urgent the journey feels
     Sometimes 
we just have to accept that a direct route 
isn’t possible or isn’t 
     advisable
     or just . . . Isn’t

We might feel ready and
we might not be
We might need time
We might get there and fail
We might not be worthy of what we are gifted
We might die on the way
We might

Only God knows
And in the meantime
We cross over anyway
And we sing 

This isn’t called the Shabbat of Freedom
We weren’t yet free
     Maybe we still aren’t
It’s called the Shabbat of Song
The Shabbat of Singing
Because even when we’re not free
     we sing of freedom
as though we are 
We sing of praise
     as if we are ready
     as if we are worthy
We sing of victory as if 
we have already 
won