Elul V: Return Us Back to This
It’s a strange thing, to have arrived
At a place you’ve been working so
Hard
to get to
And be reminded that we are always continuing forward;
To be reminded that we are meant to now ask,
“What’s next?”
Teshuvah is a return
“Not to who we were” (she teaches)
“But to who we long to be”
So much of what I have been longing for
is present now, in my life
What I long for now, is time.
Time to be this. Time to enjoy. Time to root,
To flourish
What I long for now is the artful dodge
How long before Ayin HaRa finds me
Catches up
Catches us
Causes havoc?
How long do we have in this Now?
Perhaps my prayer must be pre-emptive, then:
Return me, when it happens – return us back to this
Let this be the place that we come back to
The reset spot
Return us to one another
Return us to You
Writing Prompt: Teshuva entails a different kind of return—arduous, uncertain, unpredictable, and alive. It is a return not to what was, but to what is and what might be. It is a return not to who we were, but to who we long to be. It is a return not to an irretrievable past, but to each other and to God. (R’ Sharon Cohen Anisfeld)
