B’kol Mi-Kol Kol (Tol’dot)

God blesses Abraham
that he should have everything
 
 	Everything!
 
And we’re commanded not to covet
but I wouldn’t mind being Abraham;
getting that blessing
 
I’d like to have everything too
 	The promise of a legacy
 	The sense of purpose and direction
 	The comfort of knowing I’ll be taken care of
The happy endings
 
     	Or wait, did he end happily? Perhaps not,
     	estranged from his son;
     	widowed and alone. . .
 
So he didn’t have everything then
or else “everything” means something different 
than all things
 	or
all desired things
	or
all expected things
 
Most of what Abraham is promised he won’t live to see
 
He has to have faith
     that his progeny will have progeny
     that his legacy will last
     that the struggle was worth it
(It was, wasn’t it?)
 
Maybe that was his final test of faith -
     the one they don’t talk about -
having faith that “everything” is possible
even when you’re old and dying and alone;
that “everything”
 	includes
what you once had
what you hope to have
what you don’t know you have
and might never know you had
 
Did Old Abe die content in that knowledge?
Can I be content in that knowledge?
 
Can I redefine my need for “everything”?
Can I adjust my perceptions?
Can I be grateful for now
 	for this moment
 	for what I know I have?
Can I be satisfied?

Can some of everything be enough?
 
Bless me God
that I might have everything
     like Abe
even when I don’t have it
even when I don’t know it
 
Bless me,
that what is within
 	myself
 	my grasp
 	my perception
might feel like everything
 
Even for just a moment
 
before the cravings set in again
 
-EKG’17